Over the last few days I have been riding the proverbial emotional roller coaster as I have attended one Veterans event after another. Everything from pride to gratitude to complete sadness has gripped me as I spoke to fellow vets and listened in on many conversations between my brothers and sisters, as we took annual advantage to drag out the old stories of past battles won and innocence lost.
Once again this year as I move from event to event, I carry with me the fact that, as usual, I have a son in harm’s way. Carl (our middle boy) is in Iraq for the third time and while things are currently, thankfully quiet, you never know what tomorrow will bring.
So, Happy Veterans Day to all and a special Happy 235th Birthday to my fellow Marines, Semper Fi.
I hate Veterans Day a little more every year.
Now it’s not that I have anything against veterans, I am one. Not only that, but I’m the son of one and the father of three. My family is one of those families that stock the military ranks, we always have been; uncles, cousins, fathers and sons and in-laws across almost every war America has fought. So Veterans Day has long been significant to us.
I remember the parades of my childhood with the old men in old uniforms marching down Main Street with the sounds of Souza following them courtesy of the high school band, speeches, music, picnic suppers and the stories told by the old warriors, and us wide-eyed kids who wanted to grow up and be just like them.
It was one of the best days of the year when I was a kid. I didn’t notice then the underlying sadness in the eyes of those old men who told their tales. I didn’t understand them until many years later.
Now I’m one of the old men, and as the years have passed I have seen Veterans Day diminish as a holiday. Many businesses and schools don’t recognize the day and it slowly started losing its importance as a social gathering, not everywhere but in most places, until we went to war again and it once more began to be important.
What a quandary the day is for some of us. We feel pride that our service is remembered, but we are also sad that the numbers of our ranks are once again growing as our children and grandchildren return from the horrors of this latest war. And another generation begins to pray that they are the last one to know what the term “veteran” really means.
I hate Veterans Day because I hate the fact that the need still remains in the world to have to make new veterans. I hate Veterans Day because we still have not found a way to live together. I hate Veterans Day because my generation didn’t find a way to end war. I hate Veterans Day because my sons are fighting and being changed forever. I hate Veterans Day, mostly, because I don’t think the world’s desire to fight wars will ever change.
My sons will be those old men one day, and barring a miracle that I no longer believe in, their sons will as well, and on and on and on.
I do not mean to sound ungrateful for being remembered and I know that those who remember us do so with warm and true hearts, but wouldn’t it be fine if there were no more veterans because there is no more war? Yea, it’s a crazy idea, but wouldn’t peace just be nice for a change? Maybe someday. I guess that’s really my point.
Below is a poem my son Carl sent me. He wrote it during his second tour of duty in Iraq.
BROTHERHOOD
Sitting in a truck that stops bullets and rockets I am glad to do patrols, I am a grunt One of the proud amongst few
We walk the streets and drive the roads
To one another is where our loyalty goes
You might miss the man beside you when you get back to the states
You might stand at his funeral, and then cry at his grave
Maybe it’s your life he saved
This is the test of a man’s courage
To fight until the horrid end
To stand up to the enemy and never back down
Knowing your life rests in his hands and his in yours
A brotherhood that few have A bond that cannot be broken or severed
We were friends who became family, doing anything for one another
We all miss the brother we lost
We cherish the ones we still have
SSgt. Carl R. Fitzwater B-Co. 1/504 P.I.R. 82ND ABN DIV, Iraq
